A Million Dollar Idea

If I weren't so afraid of being investigated by the Child Protective Services I would start a business whereby one could "rent" children for the day. Why? Because of places like this where you aren't allowed without a munchkin.

I have never been excluded from a place due to lack of prodgeny. I've seen plenty of places parents couldn't go with their kids (like the pub, the local adult shop, etc.) but I have never seen a place that excludes non-child rearing adults. It's a shame too, because I like to swing and play hopscotch as much as the next kid.

These places are all over the city, and it's like peering through the gates of Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory: irresistable because they're off limits. I understand the need in a city this size. Parents need a place to go without the threat of strangers looming over their kids, and I'm thankful that there are actually safe places for children to play. It's just that I get the urge to climb a twisty slide with the best of them and New York is unfortunately without adult playgrounds. Maybe there's a card we could create that proves we've had a background check.

So if you're brave enough, and have a child you don't mind leasing for a couple of hours, I am sure there's a market for you. After all, most of us are just kids in wrinkled skin anyway.